Can't See Me
by nagi-silvermoon
Summary: When you are one out of many, what are the chances that he will see you? A one-shot catharsis with Sakuno's POV. RR please! Thanks!


**>Disclaimer ** Standard disclaimers apply.

**>Author's Notes ** some spoilers from the first 29 episodes… you've been aptly warned… R+R

**>Teaser ** When you are one out of many, what are the chances that he will see you?

**Can't See Me**

by nagi-silvermoon

You're the soloist playing on-stage and I'm just part of an audience, sitting intently in the front row, mesmerized by the magic you're wielding. You can't see us for the spotlight keeps us hidden from you to make you feel like you're alone, that no one's watching you. But when the light turns out and you're finally able to see us, will you see me? Or will you take your leave with your nonchalance, unaffected by everyone, just like you always do?

I could never fathom the reason why I find myself feeling for you. I guess the way you smoothly went in to rescue me from those raucous high school boys by putting them in their place completely blew me away like my hair on a windy day. But you were just being your introvert self then. Who am I to be worthy of notice to your great eyes that glimmer like gold? I'm just a klutz who gave you wrong directions and made you default your game.

I guess it was the admiration I found I had for you, knowing how my esteemed grandmother regarded you and your god-like prowess in playing tennis. She always had a critical eye, and seeing as to how she really praised you for your superb plays made me realize how superior you were against a lot of people our age. But, then again, who am I to be of importance to you? I'm just your coach's granddaughter, silently ogling at you as you keep your cool in the court while my heart does flips every second.

I guess it's your countenance—that indifferent yet cheeky countenance—that categorizes you as an enigma. The way you change your attitude from a really cool person into somebody nobody should dare mess with really makes it hard for me to pinpoint exactly who you are. And the sound of a good mystery still not being revealed draws me more and more to you, to be able to see more sides of you, to be able to know more about you. These are just some of the things I want to do. But, who am I to dissect you into pieces for me to analyze? I'm just a schoolmate who wants to know you better.

Or maybe it's the sweet little things that you did that make me go head-over-heels. How you bought me a can of Ponta a few times, how you didn't mind my talking to you while you shot ball after ball with your eyes closed, how you wore your Seigaku Regular jacket for the first time for me because I asked you to, or how you brought your racket along that Sunday just to be able to teach me better tennis. To you, these may mean nothing. But to me, they mean a lot. Because you shared these moments with me, and you had no qualms over it. Sure, I almost always find myself at your off or bad moods like when you blamed me for defaulting your match being it really my fault, when you completely forgot me after that, when you said my cooking wasn't good enough, or when you told me to get out of the court when I only wanted to see to your injury. But, then again, who am I to complain when I am the one who always gets around your nerves? I'm just a nobody who just so happens to be completely crazy for you.

The way you affect me in a lot of ways simply eludes me. But I know better than to question the Fates as to why they placed you in my life. One should never ask. Instead, one should always accept. And that's what I did. I accepted you as a part of my life—never to be changed, never to be forgotten.

And sometimes, I wonder. Did the Fates put me in your life? Did you accept me as a part of your life? Am I even a part of your life? A life that revolves around tennis and almost nothing else? Do I even affect you in any way the way you affect almost everything in me?

Do you see me the way I see you?

Do you even see me at all?

Somehow, I feel that when the lights turned out, you just walked right out of the stage amidst the audience's applause, not minding whether you touched them, not minding if you impressed them. Because that's just the way you are and that's what you're wont to do. You go your way as if it's the most common thing in the world. Nothing to be amazed at. And I guess that's how the way it is, the way it will always be.

"Sakuno!" Tomo-chan called. "Hurry! Practice is already starting and I don't want to miss my Ryoma-sama in action!"

I look up towards my best friend and smiled. "Coming!"

But then again, I'll just make my way to the backstage and wait for you to come, like I always do. Because you didn't see me. Because you couldn't see me.

And maybe, just maybe, with all the lights around us, you'd be able to see me just the way I saw you then, the way I see you now, and maybe just the way I will still be seeing you.

**>End **

**>Author's Notes ** this fic is just an idea that sprouted from a boring day and inspired by my liking for a superb violinist who's indifferent to his audience… thanks for still making my heart beat faster… hope you guys liked it…


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